Selfishness has a bad stigma.
I wrote in my previous posts, that because being selfish has such a negative label, many of us have been raised, believing that putting ourselves first is wrong when in fact it is healthy. Sometimes we even lack the ability to do so, we just want to be convenient for everyone else around us.
The other day someone I know had a tough decision to make. Whatever she decided on, one of the parties involved would end up unhappy. She was torn. Agonising over the dilemma clouded her vision – the mere thought that she had to make a choice that will leave someone disappointed made her miserable.
Right that moment the last person she was thinking of was HERSELF. It was not about what feels right. It was about the rational process of choosing whom to leave on the sidelines hoping they get over it…what will others think and how will they remember it in the future… Never ever did she mention – this is what I want for me.
It really hit home.
I remembered handing in my resignation last year when and all I was worried about was my boss, how it would impact them, what would they think, say, how would they feel – not me.!
Pretty ridiculous when I think about it now or when I watch a similar situation unfold, but when you are caught in the midst of it all, the most important party affected – you- often is left behind, and it is hard to see it.
You can’t keep everyone happy every time, and that is okay. The big deal is how you make the decisions on who will be left unhappy this time. Is it based on what others will say or think? Or is it because it is the right thing for you, and you feel it in your entire body- not just in your brain.
If it is, then, whatever happens, you and I will know – you made the right choice, and it is so much easier to stand by your decision and let others get over their disappointment in their own time.